The Voices Reply:
Reaper: Wha... What did she call me?
Stinger: Flaming idiot, bro.
Reaper: ... She thinks I'm a gay idiot? ... That's not very politically correct...
Stinger: ... Yes darling... Anyway...
Conscience: I'm flattered! Really, I'm blushing! I'm positively glowing!
Reaper: And she thinks I'm gay?
Conscience: Hush. Why thank you madam, I am indeed flattered. It's nice to hear such kind words... I rarely hear them here. Um, I get so lonely... would you mind maybe the two of us becoming pen-pals?
Stinger: That's your best pick-up line? I was all ready to insult you here, but now I can't bring myself to. "Pen-pals"? If our host listened to you, "The Penis" would die of embarrassment. What's all this "sensitive" shit? We have a penis. We use it. Sensitive is saying "Damn, I love the way your eyes shimmer... when you're looking up at me from between my legs".
Conscience: Stinger! Well then, fine, how would you propose I go about courting someone?
Stinger: For starters, I would stop calling it "courting". I'll help you out man. Let me show you how it's done with a little role-play. Reaper, do me a favor and pretend you're a woman.
Reaper: GOD-DAMN IT I'M NOT GAY!
Conscience: ... Right... Anyway, Thank you for your letter, Nonblonde. It is appreciated.
Copyright Josh Johnson, 2002
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