Why Do Men Like Breasts So Much?

     If you know a straight man who claims he is not fascinated with breasts, you know a man who is lying. Very few guys will pass a large-bosomed woman without taking at least a short look at her covered "boobies." If the "boobies" aren't covered... Well then, the man will be taking a much longer look.

     The question remains: Why? Actually, the answer to this question is almost unbelievably simple: We like them because they're there, and we don't have them. Not to say that we want to have breasts ourselves, so much as we just have this uncontrollable urge to fondle yours. 

     Maybe "uncontrollable" is the wrong word. For the most part, we can restrain ourselves from grabbing a total stranger's breasts. But the moment we get a chance - the very second we believe that we can fondle your breasts and get away with it...

     Well, let's just say that there aren't many men out there (some gay men included, reputable homosexual sources inform me) who are set up in a way that allows us to ignore that opportunity. 

     But that's not just men! It's a human thing, and ladies, you're guilty of being "breast obsessed" too! It's hardwired into our brains as infants, men and women alike, that breasts are an important part of our survival. Most of us lived off of the fantabulous milk-melons at one point in our life, so it's only understandable that we carry a certain fondness for them as we grow older.

     Now I know a lot of you are thinking, "Josh, you're an idiot. I'm a woman and I don't want to go out and feel up every pair of breasts I see."

     Well duh, that's because you have a pair at home! You get as much "hands on" experience as you want every time you get in the shower.

     It's true that sexualizing breasts is generally a guy thing, but if you think that you're automatically immune to the "urges" just because you don't have a penis, go ask a lesbian how well that worked out for her.

     Now that we've established why men are obsessed with breasts in general, why not go into the more specific question I hear so often: "What is it physically about breasts that makes them so appealing?" Well, let's see. They are round and soft and smooth and fun to play with, and they make great pillows, and they have these wonderful little knobs you can fiddle with, and they feel real nice when you squeeze 'em, and... um... yeah...

     There you have it, ladies. We know we love breasts. We know some of the more fundamental reasons why we love breasts. But when it comes right down to it, we really like breasts for the same reason we like lava-lamps: The jiggling is fun to watch.

     Want to find out more about men, and why they do the oft-stupid things they do? Then click here to go back to the main menu, and learn more about why men do things than they really want you know.

Copyright Josh Johnson, All Rights Reserved


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